Hey there!
It feels like I haven't written anything for so long! I have been trying to do other things for a change and I started running again...that's right! I hate running but it keeps my mind off from other things that have been making me sad lately. I just can't control my emotions anymore! These past few days I have been so messed up...what scares me the most is that I am going to have to go through that horrible depression that I had last year and right now that's the last thing I want!
At this point I should be just super excited that I have only one month left for my trip to Barcelona and be like WOHOOO! Instead I just feel numb...I am blank...no emotions...nothing. Why is that? Maybe it is because I always have too high expectations and in the end things are a lot different than I thought. This time I just want to go there without all these expectations. I guess when you don't have too high expectations you can't get disappointed either, right?
Anyway...I am trying to be positive and stop thinking too much about it :)
I had to share this picture of the most amazing moon ever. This reminds of last summer when I used to sit by the sea and watch the moon for ages...good times :)
It feels like I haven't written anything for so long! I have been trying to do other things for a change and I started running again...that's right! I hate running but it keeps my mind off from other things that have been making me sad lately. I just can't control my emotions anymore! These past few days I have been so messed up...what scares me the most is that I am going to have to go through that horrible depression that I had last year and right now that's the last thing I want!
At this point I should be just super excited that I have only one month left for my trip to Barcelona and be like WOHOOO! Instead I just feel numb...I am blank...no emotions...nothing. Why is that? Maybe it is because I always have too high expectations and in the end things are a lot different than I thought. This time I just want to go there without all these expectations. I guess when you don't have too high expectations you can't get disappointed either, right?
Anyway...I am trying to be positive and stop thinking too much about it :)
I had to share this picture of the most amazing moon ever. This reminds of last summer when I used to sit by the sea and watch the moon for ages...good times :)
Karoliina
I know that whatever someone writes or says doesn't help when you are feeling depressed, but I'll give it a try:
ReplyDeleteLife is a complicated thing, we have reasons to be sad or happy, cry and laugh. Some people have many reasons to be sad and still they are able to smile and some have even more reasons to laugh and they feel sad. So what we feel, is not so much from outside, but from inside and it seems to me that you have realized this.
Are you afraid that because you are waiting for this trip for so long, it can never fill your expectations? It really may not, but so what? It'll be something new and different anyway and in the worst case it's a bad experience. Isn't it still sooo much better to have the courage to do something than not to do anything because you can never know if it's going to succeed?
My speculations may not help you, but I really hope that you somehow get over your low feelings and we, who are following your blog, will be able to learn in the near future about your adventures in Barcelona. Even in case your experiences there are going to be worse than your expectations.
I do feel for you and I think I even understand at least a bit how you are feeling right now.
By the way, you moon-pic is REALLY AMAZING!
Thank you so much for your comment! You really did make me feel a lot better and I wish I could think that way every time I am feeling sad. In the end of the day only by going there I am going to find out what it's going to be like :)
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