Monday, January 30, 2012

More open-minded!


Some of my friends have been asking what karpalo means. Well, it is a little red berry that tastes awful (for more information go to google!). Some people used to call me karpalo, because my real name is Karoliina. Maybe they were trying to say something by calling me that way. I might look small and cute, but I can be a bit bitter and mean sometimes! Buahaha... :P

Actually, I am not as horrible as I used to be. Every time we start talking about my childhood, I always get to hear all the little details about how horrible I was.You see, I was nothing like my sister who was calm and an easy kid in general. I used to scream, blame my older siblings and do other cute things! :) Maybe that is the reason why my parents didn't want more kids after they had me! :P Nah...I don't think that's true, but I am thankfull that my parents still love me, even though I made their life a bit difficult when I was younger.

I have changed in many ways since then. I was talking about it with one of my friends today and she has noticed it aswell. If we don't count the changes in my personality, I will give you some examples of the little changes in everyday life. The first one is that I go to the gym. If somebody had told me two years ago that I would be going to the gym five times a week I would say  "Yeah right! I would never do that!". I have always been the lazy one in my family. We had a bet with my brother in August that I would start going by bike everywhere for at least a month and that's what I did! Not only for one month but for two months! I used to bike at least 12 km every day. He still owes me those thirty euros he promised to give me!;)

Also, nowdays I love reading books which I used to hate when I was a kid! I always thought books were boring, but I never bothered to open one. Actually, my mom used to give me all that Finnish literature that was so boring (sorry mom D: ). So I thought that all books are like that. When I moved to Finland I started going to the library and suddenly I found books that I liked ( I just stayed away from the Finnish literature department!). That's how I started reading novels in english. Cecelia Ahern is one of my favourite authors, because the language she uses is so simple to understand. I read all her books in a short period which is huge for me, because reading 500 pages in english, isn't that easy. So you can call me a book freak now!

I have never been a very open-minded person and I regret being so negative about some things. Now that I have been trying new things I have seen some small changes in my personality aswell, which is strange. I am more organized and satisfied in my life.

So my last word for today is try new things! Be more open-minded! :)


              We have had some snow in Finland! Yey! :)

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Confused or just stressed?


I have been a bit messed up lately, so I haven't been able to write for a while. This week has been very hectic and suddenly I feel like I am falling apart. I am glad everything is going to be over soon and maybe I should just relax and do my best for my exams. The only thing I can do now is just study, study, study!

I have to admit that I have been thinking about my future plans way too much lately. I know, that the last time I said about doing the things I want and following my dreams, and that is what I want to do. We only live once, but lately there is always an "if" in everything, like "what if my plans don't work out" or "what if  I don't get a job" and so on...This stupid "if" pisses me off sometimes! I don't know about you, but for me it has been very difficult not to stress about my future. I wish I could focus on this day and stop stressing about everything! I am only eighteen, there is no need to stress about every little thing in life!

I have always been like my dad. I am super sensitive and I tend to stress a lot! Thank God that my dad has learned to stress less and enjoy every day, and I have been trying to do the same. I am glad that I have made some progress these past two years and I am proud of myself. My mom always tells me that I there is no use on thinking about the future too much, because you never know what might happen, and I agree. When my father was diagnosed that he had a brain tumor, we didn't expect it and we had to learn live with it. It brought us closer as a family and we realised that you can never take something for granted, not even your health.

So what, if my plans don't go exactly the way I wanted! Something unexpected can happen and that's okay! After all, things might turn out better than I thought! :)

Have a great Saturday night!


Monday, January 23, 2012



It is Monday once again and it is pretty much my favourite day, because I had only three hours of school!(yey!) Can't believe how these three years have gone by so fast! This is my last week of school and I couldn't be more excited! I have had my good and bad moments while I have been here and today I thought it would be good to share my "bad" experiences with you...It isn't easy for me to talk about this, but I think I am finally ready to write about everything that happened to me last year.

I don't even know from where to start so maybe I will just start from the beginning. I guess everything started in autumn 2010, I had been for one year in Finland and everything seemed to be going well. I had spent the summer in Greece and suddenly when I came back to Finland, it felt like nobody wanted to spend time with me anymore. People seemed to be so busy and I didn't have a really close friend at the time, plus I had difficulties adjusting to the finnish culture and everything. So I found myself a hobby to keep me busy and that is when I started dance lessons again. For a while it helped, but I couldn't believe how my friends could be so "blind" and not see how lonely I felt. Of course, now that I look back, I can't blame them, because I looked happy on the outside, but I was truly miserable on the inside.

 So I just left time pass and didn't do anything about all these feelings I had (which I don't recommend to anyone!). I kept acting like everything was okay, but it surely wasn't. What made me get even more annoyed, was the fact that I was always the first one to ask my friends out and do something. So in the end I got sick of all that. I stopped going out, kept myself closed in my room and that's how things got worse. Maybe, if I had talked about my problems from the beginning, I wouldn't have felt so awful in the end.

Christmas came and I kept feeling the way I felt. Going home for the holidays helped me a bit to forget my problems, but when I came back to Finland everything was the same. I started getting really depressed. School wasn't going very well and I was very tired all the time. I thought nobody in this world cared about me. I was crying every day and wishing for all this to end. I remember sometimes I had to call my parents in the middle of the night to calm me down. I had never felt that horrible in my life and I hope that nobody gets to experience something like that.

In January 2011 my mom got in touch with my headmaster and they talked about my situation. I couldn't have stayed any longer in Finland or I would have gone crazy! If that situation had kept going like that I am afraid I would have hurt myself or done something even worse. So my parents thought it would be good for me to go back to Greece for a month and clear things out. Also before I left Finland, I went to our school psychologist who really helped make some right decisions.

Going back home really helped me calm down and rethink everything. Because I had difficulties telling my friends face to face about my problems, I decided to send them a letter and that's what I did. That letter helped me and my friends come closer. At first they got mad at me, because I hadn't said anything earlier, but I think I wouldn't have been very honest with them, if I had told them earlier.

Now that I am over that phase, I have learned to talk about the things that bother me early enough. Nobody else can know what is going on inside your head unless you tell them. Don't be afraid to talk just spit it out! :P
In my case I thought everything would get better on their own...maybe in a perffect world that would have happened!

I have learned from my mistakes and I hope that my story helped you realize some things about life!

Compared to last year I feel like I am alive again! I enjoy every day and I couldn't be happier :)
I wish the best to all of you! 

Have a great week! :)


Friday, January 20, 2012

Follow my heart

Hello everybody!

This has been a lovely week even though I have been very busy! Being busy is good though, because you don't have time to get bored! :P Also... I applied for a job today, so I am really really really hoping they will answer me soon! I will try to contact other places too, but I am going one step at a time. :)

I am glad you (or at least some of you) liked the post I wrote on Monday, but I am sure most of you have thought about these things before, so maybe I will keep writing about my personal life!

So today I would like to write about my future plans! Me and my friends have been talking about this subject for a while now, so I thought it would be nice to tell you about my dreams. Every time when people ask me what I want to do after I finish school, the answer is always the same " I want to go to Spain"! Usually most young people, at least in Greece, say they want to go study something and then, if lucky enough, get a job. So when I say to people about my plans they look at me like if I was crazy or something! It is my dream to learn Spanish and no matter what other people think I am going to Spain!!! My whole life I have been doing what my parents or teachers have told me to do and I am soooo sick of it! I have only one life and I want to live it the way I want!

 I have been going to school for 13 years and I deserve to do once in my life something that I want! What is the point of going straight to college or university anyways?? Should there be on order how things should be done? Of course not! I want to do things my way which means stop caring about other people's opinions!

I am happy for my sister who got married young and studies something she really loves, but it feels that my parents want me to follow the steps of my older siblings. What if I am not meant to do things the same way?

I don't feel ready to go study something and I am so sick of studying in general! That is why I am going to Spain! A new culture, new people, a new city, a new everything! I need a break from the things I know and the things I have already seen. I don't want to live a life full of regrets. You never know what obstacles life can bring, so why keep on waiting to do something later while you can do it now?

For a change I would like to be unreasonable and follow my heart! It's important to fulfill my dreams and do something exciting and spontaneous for once! I have the rest of my life for studies so why such a hurry? :P

Okay....I will stop writing now! I get too excited each time and don't know how to stop! :D

I hope you all have a lovely weekend and don't stop smiling :)


Monday, January 16, 2012

So messed up...

Moi taas!

So you might be thinking why I chose to put such a weird title for my todays' post. It all started as I was organizing my closet on Saturday and I am not wondering why I couldn't find anything out of that mess!

As I was putting everything back in order I was actually very surprised of the amount of clothes I have ( Not to mention that almost half of my clothes are in Greece...just saying! )! How a tiny person like me, can have so many clothes and other things? Okay, it is obvious that I like to shop, but what came to me as I was putting everything in order, was why people have the need to buy new clothes and other useless things all the time? I am sure I am not the only person in this world who owns a lot of useless stuff! So I have been thinking about human behaviour and why people have the need to buy, buy, buy and I have some thoughts that I would like to share with you!

First of all, people are so eager ( not sure if this is the right word, I trust google :P ) that the idea of not having everything doesn't come to our minds! I am sure it is human nature that makes people act that way, but where comes the line to normal and abnormal spending? Secondly, we get jealous of what other people have and compare ourselves with others which is so stupid in my opinion! No matter how hard you try, you know you can't have everything in this world! People change mobiles every six months or buy new cars every two years or one year....and all that for what? Just to show off and have something to brag about. I feel sorry for those people who think that a new phone can change their lives and make them feel important! I am not saying that you should feel bad about buying something new, don't take me wrong! What I am trying to say is think before you buy or you might end up having your wardrobe full of useless things just like me! :P

For me buying something new makes me happy for a short time and I hope I don't do it to show off, but I would like to learn to live with a lot less! So I have decided to limit my spendings and learn my lesson! So what you can learn from my experiences? Think before you buy! :)

Have a great week!

Friday, January 13, 2012


¡Hola a todos!
 (I am showing off my excellent Spanish skills hehe...:P)

I don't have enough time to write every day, but I have decided to write at least once or twice a week! That way I will have more things to write about each time! Yey!:D

This week has gone sooooo slowly...I don't understand why, but it seems like I have been in Finland for over a month and not for one week. Now that I am here I enjoy being with my friends and stuff, but I have to admit that the cold weather isn't my thing! I also fell almost three times today, because of the ice on the streets! A bit embarrassing... :P

This last week I have been just studying and going to school pretty much...boring! The only thing that gives me comfort is that in March all this is going to be over and I will hopefully graduate high school!! Wohoooo! :D:D

I am glad I have my friends to make this time of the year more fun and I am so gratefull for having them in my life! For a long time I had difficulties finding good friends. I always felt that I wasn't good enough which isn't true of course! :P I just wasn't hanging out with the right people at the time. After feeling so lonely and depressed the last year, it feels like now that I have gotten over that phase I am so thankfull for being surrounded by people who really care about me.

My friends mean a lot to me and I love them just the way they are!  I hope you remember to appreciate your friends, because most people take them for granted these days!

I hope you all have a lovely weekend! :)

Monday, January 9, 2012

Between two countries


This is my second post and I am getting really into this blog thing!Ha! :D I hope you all understand my english...I have forgotten most of it I must say, but at least all my friends from Greece and Finland understand what I am writing! I am too lazy to translate from finnish to greek or the opposite.

I already got 3 comments on my first post so I must thank you for commenting! It made me happy to know that there are people who think that my life is interesting! :D

I had a drama on Friday while I was coming back to Finland. I was crying on the plane and I couldn't breathe very was horrible! I don't know why leaving Greece has been so hard for me. I was fifteen when I decided to move to Finland and you can't imagine how relieved I was to leave!  For me Greece was the worst country to live in ( teenage bullshit ). I was so fed up with Greece that I didn't appreciate the good things I had there. I was complaining about the sun, the sea, the food, the people...almost everything. I am glad I moved to Finland because I got a good lesson in life... BE HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE AND DON'T COMPLAIN! hehehe... I will never regret I moved to Finland, because now I have learned to be thankfull for all the good things Greece and Finland have. It took me some time to realise it I must admit  :P but as greeks say better late than never.

Being from two countries has been a blessing and a curse at the same time. I have always felt that I don't belong anywhere. In Greece I am the finnish girl and in Finland I am the greek girl. When I was in Greece I missed Finland now I miss Greece. There is no end to this situation! I still don't know what to say to people when they ask me where I am from.
But on the other hand I can't imagine how it would feel like being from one country. I wouldn't be the same person. I  am happy how things are but it isn't easy struggling with these feelings all the time...

Now it's getting late and I don't want to talk too much! bla bla bla....
Goodnight everybody!

(Remember to comment! I would be glad to know your opinion about my posts! )

Sunday, January 8, 2012

A new beginning!

Hello everybody!

These last years have been crazy and I have to admit that 2011 was one of the most interesting years I have ever lived. I went through difficult times and I thank my family and friends for being there for me.

This year I promised to myself I would try to make things better in life. I am the kind of person who gets stressed very easily and that has affected my life in a negative way. So 2012 is going to be a new beginning for a healthier, happier and less stressfull life.

It is my first time writing a blog and I have to admit that I have no idea how this thing works. I hope I will learn to use it soon! :):)